Update

(Yesterday) Here I am again, three days later and I'm much changed. Very much. First, the pain has been reduced greatly. I really want to cry about this and I will, but I'm still at a stage where I don't quite believe it has happened. Two full years of pain. Pain that would never quite go away, even with all the narcotics I was taking. Pain that was masked but never absent. And now it's negligible. Sure, I have some pain right now but I can tell that most of it is from the surgery itself and it will go away in time. As a graduate student of pain I know the difference.

The surgery itself took a little over four hours, about twice as long as my surgeon had hoped for. He described the process for me; cutting away at the scar tissue from the previous surgery bit by bit while looking for the offending nerve and being extremely careful. Of course. Unfortunately, nerves and scar tissue look very much alike. When he found the nerve he followed it down the tiny tunnel that led away from the spine until he found the 'sharp pointy thing' that was pressing into it. Carefully moving the nerve out of the way, he excised the 'pointy thing' and all of the material nearby. He also opened up a much larger tunnel for the nerve to reside in and that is where it is right now; bruised and somewhat angry, as only nerves can get. But…the main source of irritation is gone.

(Today) I feel odd and words are not coming easily these days. I'm sure it's because I am not entirely certain of the success of the surgery and all my attention is focused on how I feel and then trying to sort out the pains. Is that pain, ouch! from the surgery or is it from the condition that existed before surgery? A new pain? Ouch! What's the cause for it? I'm afraid that all of this detective work uses up most of my mental capacity for reasoning.

    I need to get over it and concentrate on the fact that I do
feel better. A whole lot better! And I have to realize that this process of pain reduction will take some time. And some effort on my part as I must be exercising and walking daily. I'm only four days post op and I still have surgical pain to deal with and that will take some time. Plus, I have to stretch the nerve pathways every day with a set of exercises that bring me pain. Okay, the word 'pain' is still going to be part of my everyday vocabulary but I will have room for other words now and that is what I wanted from my surgery.