Monday, June 02, 2008

Darn it!

I’m still wondering about my future. Will I ever do another marathon? Should I get an opinion from a surgeon? Should I give up the acupuncture and go for pain relief by more traditional methods? Here’s my problem; I’ve defined who I am by what I do. I became an athlete, a racewalker. I did 5 full marathons and dozens of shorter races, ranging from 1 mile to half marathon distances. I trained for ¾ of each year and loved the thought that I was going to be a different kind of elder citizen. An active one that defied the conventional beliefs about elderhood. I wanted to be racing at the age of 90. But now…who am I? I have no identity. I’m just another old guy who’s in a lot of pain and walks slowly.

OK, it’s just a moment or two of pessimism. I will get over it.

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