Thursday, May 28, 2009

Here I am…again

All present and accounted for. OK, now that I have started the day, in which direction should I head with my writing? Should I ignore the obvious? Nah! I will have to write about what is happening and what's happening is more of the same old, same old…pain.

That's right; this blog is all about me and what's happening in my life. You can have your own blog if you want to read about you. And since this is my blog, I'm writing all about the pain…again. I was very depressed because of it yesterday and I think it was because I was watching a 75 year old guy painting my family room. Something I can no longer do for myself. It was very much a 'pity me' moment. Not that there is anything wrong with that, there isn't, as every once in awhile you have to be vulnerable and human. Besides, pity is sometimes therapeutic. It's a place to recover your perspective on life. I'm trying.

Now, on to today and the subject at hand. The pain is back with a vengeance. I don't know what I did to cause it, but there's no escaping it. The drugs aren't even touching it this morning and so I must wait and then wait some more. I know that patience is needed more than drugs and that the injured nerves will quiet themselves eventually, until the next time I stand or sit or walk or lean or bend...

Ah! There it goes…it's slowly fading as the nerves in my lower spine become used to this new and unique position; sitting. I really don't know if the drugs do much at all for the pain itself; perhaps they are simply making me a dull boy that forgets things like pain. Well, whatever works.

But what I really want is relief forever. I want to become 'normal' again. Any kind of normal will do. And that depends on the surgery and that's still a month or more away. I don't even have a date for it as the surgery schedules are all messed up because of the lack of specialized surgical suites; the room they do the surgery in. It has to be a sterile laminar airflow surgery unit and there is only one of those in the immediate area. There used to be two available, but one is being remodeled.

Remember when America was the leader in health care around the world? Well, I could have gone to Thailand this spring and had my surgery at Bumrungrad Hospital in Bangkok and I would be home now and recovering…and the cost would have been around $8,000, not including airfare.

Bumrungrad Hospital Link

1 comment:

Kitty said...

After your appointment in June, you can still select to do this, if they put you off any longer. Sad commentary on our health system for sure, but it is an option you can keep on your list.